The Journey so far...

I John 3:16-18
This is how we know what love is: Jesus Christ laid down his life for us. And we ought to lay down our lives for our brothers. If anyone has material possessions and sees his brother in need but has no pity on him, how can the love of God be in him? Dear children, let us not love with words or tongue but with actions and in truth.

Without really knowing it, Jes and I have been on a journey for several years now. I'd like to share the highlights with you and then let you in on what God is up to (at least the small part that I can see from here).

March 2007: Jes went to Venezuela (first global mission trip for either of us). He was broken by the poverty he witnessed, devastated for how some people have to live. He came home and said he was "physically ill" coming into our large, luxurious home. Realized that many people he just met live in houses that would fit inside half of our garage. He waited patiently for me to "get it". He had a rather long wait.

November 2008: I went to Guatemala. Starting to "get it". Heartbroken. It was also at that time that I first understood what it meant to really seek God. I came home “addicted” to living for God’s glory. I came home and told Jes I’d rather take a mission trip than a vacation to the beach. He smiled and agreed.

Fall 2008: We read the Treasure Principle (Alcorn) and became overwhelmingly convicted that we were not being good stewards of our money. We began to completely see possessions differently and even began to be truly disgusted with the things we had wasted money on. Why were we spending money on temporary, superficial things when God had blessed us to bless and serve others…to make an eternal impact... to bring Him glory?

Fall 2008: Our pastor challenges us with the Radical series. If you haven't heard it, I beg you to check it out at
http://www.brookhills.org/media/series/radical/

We were challenged with the words of Jesus. Jesus says that in order to be a true follower we are to give up everything for His sake. This Christianity is not comfortable or easy but it is the Christianity of the Bible. It is not routine religion. It is outright devotion to follow a Savior who never accumulated wealth and did nothing for selfish gain but lived a life of compassion and sacrifice.

We put our house on the market.

Spring 2009: We began to beg God to make our lives count. Our conversations totally changed. Our goals and dreams started to drift away from wealth and possessions to God’s vision for our lives. God was changing us.

Fall 2009: By this point we were desperate. I was so excited to go to Guatemala but frustrated that it was only for a week. Jes was so disappointed that he hadn’t been able to go to Honduras (thanks to a military coup that shut down the country). God was breaking us.

Fall 2009: Jes attended a Men's Discovery Weekend. He was convicted that he had not been trusting God. God told him, nearly audibly, "I am faithful. I am faithful. Trust Me with everything."

Fall 2009: We began doing Angel Food ministries where we delivered food to needy families once a month. We loved it. We loved spending our day serving others, building relationships, sharing God's hope and love, and living out the gospel. We began to say, “once a month is not enough” “One week a year is not enough”. I was frustrated but Jes was confident. He said over and over, “God is preparing us for something”.

Fall 2009: I came across a blog by an incredible young woman who has given up everything to serve orphans in Uganda. THAT'S the life I want! A life poured out for the sake of others. A life that follows the example of Jesus and brings great glory to God.
(http://kissesfromkatie.blogspot.com)

So we started to joke about packing up and moving to Uganda to take care of orphans. That didn't seem like a likely route for us but we were yearning to be called to something bigger than ourselves. I started researching international missions, pleading with God to SHOW US SOMETHING.

Mar 5, 2010. Jes and I get a night away. We spend the four-hour drive, dinner, and the rest of the evening having the same conversation we'd had for months. That night I tearfully told Jes that I physically ache to live a life of complete devotion to God. I’m hurting to see God’s glory in my life – it’s a yearning I can’t describe. Jes shares my heart, my longings. So we pray, once more, together, submitting our lives to God, begging for direction.

Mar 7, 2010. We go to church and our pastor presents information on East Lake, part of inner city Birmingham. One of the poorest areas. Staggering statistics on unemployment, orphaned children, single-parent homes, suffering right here in our own city. He challenges us to pray about moving there to serve, be community, be Jesus to the hurting and lost of Birmingham. Something stirred deep within me – to the core of my soul. I couldn't stop weeping, tears flowing down my face. I wrote across the top of my worship guide IS THIS OUR UGANDA?

I will admit that I was scared. I didn't want to go (see previous post What is my Egypt?). I was terrified. Jes was not. He didn't hesitate to commit to praying about this possibility. We even went back and sat through the service again to process all that was said. After several days of praying, Jes realized we were no longer praying "God, tell us if we should go". We were praying "Tell us if we should not" and we could not come up with a single reason. What legitimate reasons do we really have to not go? What is more valuable to us than a life lived out for God's glory?

Joshua 1:9 Have I not commanded you? Be strong and courageous. Do not be frightened and do not be dismayed, for the LORD your God is with you wherever you go.

So here we are. Waiting on the house to sell. Trying to be patient but feeling like we will not be living out our calling until we are living in East Lake. We trust fully that God has all the details and all the timing worked out. So we wait. Begging God to use us TODAY to live a life worthy of the calling. Would you pray for us?

2 Thessalonians 1:11-12: With this in mind, we constantly pray for you, that our God may count you worthy of his calling, and that by his power he may fulfill every good purpose of yours and every act prompted by your faith. We pray this so that the name of our Lord Jesus may be glorified in you, and you in him, according to the grace of our God and the Lord Jesus Christ

Our God is Eager to Bless Us

Last week, we read in Deuteronomy 28 about the blessings for obedience and the curses for disobedience that God laid out for His people. It was a stark reminder that God is serious about our obedience...and He should be. His people are intended to reflect His nature, His name, His glory.

I couldn't help but notice that the section on curses was much longer than the section on blessings. Maybe that's because God knew Israel (and all people after them) would seem to be disobedient more often than they were obedient. But don't miss it...God comes back to blessing in chapter 30. Knowing that His people will turn from Him and rebel against Him, He promises that when they repent He will forgive them and bless them. He will restore and prosper them. And not just a little - "abundantly"!

How many of us love to quote Jeremiah 29:11? "For I know the plans I have for you declares the Lord, plans to prosper you and not to harm you, to give you a hope and a future." I love that verse. But you know what I love even more about that verse? It's God speaking to His people during their exile. They have rebelled and failed miserably as the people of God and He is drawing them back. He is faithful when we are not. He gives grace when we least deserve it. He is generous when we have nothing to offer in return. He is our God and He loves us and is eager to bless us. May that compel us to a life of obedience for His glory!

-holly

Sick of it

I'm sick of it. Sitting in my fancy office, wearing my nice clothes, looking out my floor to ceiling windows at a beautiful lake. I'm sick of it. I'm physically sick of having hurting people drive across town to see me for an evaluation and turn around and drive right back to their poverty...while I sit comfortably at my desk wondering what the drug reps are bringing for lunch. I am so very grateful for my job and my life but I can no longer deny that there are hurting, starving, suffering people right here in my own city. I've prayed for God to break my heart for what breaks His...and He is doing just that.

I just met a couple. Their story is so similar to so many others I've heard over the years. He was working in a manual labor job, got hurt, and now they have nothing. He is in constant pain with no medical care. They live in the projects and have to beg for help to keep their lights and heat on. And they have a 6-year-old little boy depending on them. She is looking for work but has little experience and even fewer opportunities.

I evaluated him for disability and asked him if he had any questions for me. You know what he said? "Just one question...would you pray for us?" And I broke. For the first time, I really saw this couple, this man and this woman created in God's image. I saw pain and despair and my heart broke. Would I pray for them? You bet. And I did. I prayed with them, cried with them, and hugged them, wishing with everything I had that I could take away their pain.

They left but their story still pierces my heart. Not because it's so unique or tragic but because God's children in one zipcode should not be suffering like this while His children in the next zipcode live in luxury. I'm sick of it.

What is my Egypt?

In Numbers the Israelites stand at the edge of the Promised Land. The land God has promised to them for generations, the fulfillment of a promise made to their patriarch Abraham. To get them to this point God has done nothing short of astonishing miracle after astonishing miracle. He has made His presence known to them in a cloud and in fire. They can see His presence with their own eyes. So they stand, an army ready to enter the land...and they lose their faith. They get scared. They forget God's grace and His faithfulness. They even cry out that they want to go back to Egypt, the land of their slavery.

So what is my Egypt? What do I choose over God's promises? What looks safe and secure but is nothing but shackles and chains? When I take my eyes off God and start to panic, what do I turn to even though God has freed me from it? Is it my house? Maybe my job or the paycheck that comes with it? Is it feeling safe in my gated community or knowing my child is getting a great education in an adorable school that looks like a castle? A lot of the times it's the dreams, the vision I have of a "nice life" with summers spent at the pool, fall spent at football games, and life spent enjoying one event after another. These are Egypt to me. At one point they make me feel safe and secure and then I look again and realize they may be the very things that enslave me. The very things that I cling to instead of clinging tightly to my God. The very things that make me swallow hard when I think of giving them up.

But wouldn't I give it all up...every bit of it to see God's glory in my life? The house, the job, the dream are worthless without Him. They are fading, corroding, disintegrating right in front of my eyes. Only His glory is forever.

God, please please show me how to live this short day in light of an eternal tomorrow. I want my life to count. Don't let me waste it. You are worth it.

-holly

Knowing Him is Enough

Here's one of my greatest pet peeves: "When I get to heaven, the first thing I'm gonna do is ask God ________ !"

Doubtful. I bet Job had that thought though. He clearly didn't understand why he was suffering, why his friends were allowed to go on and on about some secret sin that didn't exist, why God wasn't vindicating him. But when God finally revealed Himself to Job (as He will do when we meet Him in heaven), Job was stunned to silence. Then God revealed more about Himself and Job said

"I know that You can do all things and that no purpose of Yours can be thwarted...Therefore I have uttered what I did not understand, things too wonderful for me, which I do not know...I had heard of You by the hearing of the ear, but now my eye sees You"

I'm actually comforted to know that the God of the universe does not owe me an explanation for anything, but if I seek Him, He will reveal Himself to me. He doesn't answer with why...He answers with Who. May that be enough for me.

Guatemala 09 The Ends of the Earth

Before leaving for Guatemala, I had been praying about how God would use our team and where He might send us. Last year was my first trip and I was so broken by the poverty I saw. I also learned that when I am broken, God reveals Himself in new and amazing ways. So this year, I selfishly prayed that God would take our team to the most remote, needy, desperate village possible. God has been teaching me that the poor and the needy are so very close to His heart…and we are close to His heart when we love His children in need. So that was my prayer, “God take us to the most remote village possible!” In the lake region where we minister, the further up the mountain you go, the poorer the people are. On Monday, our first day to do VBS, our team was told to get in line first for breakfast because we had the furthest to go. We were going to the top of the mountain to a village that had never had VBS before. We were warned that it was cold and windy at the top of the mountain, the people were very poor, they didn’t speak Spanish because they were of Mayan descent, and they had minimal electricity and no running water. But there was a tiny church there eager for our support, love, and attention. We drove straight up the mountain for two hours. We drove down a dirt road and when we got to the end of the road, we drove on the grass until we were literally at the top of the mountain…the end of the road…the most remote village possible. Praise God for answering prayers!

The children of this village were very wary of us. We weren’t sure if they had ever seen white faces before. They had no television, no books, and there certainly weren’t any tourists coming by! We started with music and the children warmed up to us. Our Impacto interpreter presented the Bible lesson in Spanish and the church’s pastor translated it into the local language for the 100+ children present. The children were enthralled. I’d never seen so many children sitting so quietly and attentively. We then did our craft with them and spent time playing with them. Impacto provided a nutritious lunch (a liquid protein meal) for the children and after lunch we did Happy Feet. I cannot put into words how challenging and difficult but amazing this was. Many of the children had shoes but they were in horrible shape. Their feet were absolutely black with dirt and most of them had sores all over them. So we washed those little feet with baby wipes, lots and lots of baby wipes, and put new socks and new shoes on them. It was so humbling to serve these precious children this way. And it was hard. At one point I was genuinely afraid I would vomit from the stench as I pulled rotting shoes off one child’s feet. It was hard but I’d do it again and again and again to have the privilege of showing the love of Jesus to His children. Those little ones are created in His image. What an honor it was to care for them.

I was later journaling and listening to music and one song quotes a verse that was so fitting: Isaiah 24:16 says “From the ends of the earth we hear singing: ‘Glory to the Righteous One’.” Yes, God, from the ends of the earth, the top of the mountain, the end of the road…we hear voices singing Your praises!

And that was just day one.

Guatemala 08 God's timing is perfect

One of my favorite experiences that week was meeting Domingo. Domingo was an elderly man who lived in San Pablo where my team was holding VBS. The first day our bus was an hour late picking us up after VBS. As we were standing around waiting, Domingo walked up to us and wanted to show us his Bible. We realized that Domingo had a Jehovah’s Witness bible. He was a sincere man who genuinely wanted to know God. We offered to bring him a new Bible if he would give us his old one. He agreed. We returned the next day and it was obvious he was surprised but so grateful to see that we had come back to find him. We prayed with him, He accepted Christ and he eagerly traded his old bible for the true gospel! He immediately sat on his doorstep to read and when we looked back a few minutes later he was reading the Word of God to two young boys! God used a “late” bus to introduce us to a man who had nothing to do with our VBS plans so that he could come to know Christ and be an influence for Christ in his village. We came back to pray with Domingo each day, bring him and his wife food, and encourage him. It was such a powerful reminder that God was in control and had a plan far greater than we could see.